Nowadays most people ain’t even dating, they’re just talking, fucking, catching feelings, and ending up in situations
real friends hit each other’s prostate
back when i was in community college my teacher told us the story of a girl in his class who wanted to have sex with her boyfriend but they didnt have any lube so they used mayonnaise. fast forward a couple of days and she’s getting random orgasms during class and driving places so she goes to the doctor and they check her out and guess what they found
okay ill tell you it was maggots. maggots were in her vagina giving her orgasms.
Justin Bieber could feed a bunch of newborns to starved alligators and #staystrongjustin would still trend on instagram I’m done
I love The Sims because it’s basically just a bunch of pansexual people speaking gibberish and setting their houses on fire.
Any salad can be a Caesar salad if you stab it enough
wait for it
I have to shit so bad y’all
today in history class we had this easy quiz and the question was who is the vice president and i raised my hand to say joe biden but i accidentally said joe jonas
One more month.
*smirks like an anime protagonist who knows he has the upper hand in a battle*
i probably still have a crush on danny phantom somewhere deep in my soul