The world is a stage but the play is badly cast

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Sat, 25 May 2013 15:06:59 -0400

emilioestevez: story time so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so...

Sat, 25 May 2013 02:25:07 -0400

story time

so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so i did and we lived together for roughly 6 weeks. she asked me to move out until i was mature enough to live with a girl because in those 6 weeks i drew a dick on her face while she was sleeping 11 times.

I’m really good at keeping secrets because five minutes later I forget what you told me because I...

Sat, 25 May 2013 01:57:00 -0400

I’m really good at keeping secrets because five minutes later I forget what you told me because I don’t care

the-lonely-scottish-guy: if everybody got a free miniature animal at birth that protected you, like...

Sat, 25 May 2013 01:54:38 -0400

the-lonely-scottish-guy:

if everybody got a free miniature animal at birth that protected you, like a tiny elephant or dragon, the world would be a better place.

i literally just wanna go to concerts, make out, cuddle, and sleep a lot

Sat, 25 May 2013 01:54:12 -0400

i literally just wanna go to concerts, make out, cuddle, and sleep a lot

Why get laid when you can get paid

Sat, 25 May 2013 01:23:09 -0400

Why get laid when you can get paid

javaddward: anonymously tell me your credit card number ill reply with what I bought

Sat, 25 May 2013 01:21:33 -0400

javaddward:

anonymously tell me your credit card number ill reply with what I bought

kathybethterry: Amanda Bynes appears in New York City court on...

Sat, 25 May 2013 00:52:38 -0400

kathybethterry:

Amanda Bynes appears in New York City court on drug charges

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Sat, 25 May 2013 00:48:48 -0400

suicidle: i was at mcdonalds and this kid dropped his chocolate...

Sat, 25 May 2013 00:42:37 -0400

suicidle:

i was at mcdonalds and this kid dropped his chocolate milk, began to cry, and his dad got up, said “this some instagram shit” and starte taking pictures and i cant breath

castiel-in-a-sherlocked-tardis: your-pal-lindsay: thesmoshfangirl: chinchillaghosts: wivernryder:...

Fri, 24 May 2013 18:15:57 -0400

castiel-in-a-sherlocked-tardis:

your-pal-lindsay:

thesmoshfangirl:

chinchillaghosts:

wivernryder:

chinchillaghosts:

heyfunnie:

why is bob short for robert

how does one get ‘billy’ out of ‘william’?

How in hell do you get “Dick” from “Richard”?

you ask him nicely

you ask him nicely

i have been waiting for yEARS FOR THIS POST TO COME BACK YOU DONT UNDERSTAND

JDHGFJ IT’S BACK

twiistz: i met a girl with 12 nipples sounds funny dozen tit

Fri, 24 May 2013 18:15:18 -0400

twiistz:

i met a girl with 12 nipples
sounds funny
dozen tit

thedramaticsneeze: hoshigumayuugi: i actually like being up early i just don’t like getting up...

Fri, 24 May 2013 16:49:39 -0400

thedramaticsneeze:

hoshigumayuugi:

i actually like being up early i just don’t like getting up early

YOU PUT THIS IN WORDS

carryonmyhighfunctioningtardis: it’s nearly june, half the year is nearly done and all I...

Fri, 24 May 2013 16:49:00 -0400

carryonmyhighfunctioningtardis:

it’s nearly june, half the year is nearly done and all I have achieved this year so far is learning the alphabet backwards

class is too quiet

Fri, 24 May 2013 14:38:10 -0400

class is too quiet
stomach: ladies and gentlemen i shall play you the song of my people

peeta-ismydandelion-inthespring: agentscully: Who needs extreme sports when making grown-up phone...

Fri, 24 May 2013 14:13:09 -0400

peeta-ismydandelion-inthespring:

agentscully:

Who needs extreme sports when making grown-up phone calls gives me more adrenaline than I will ever need for the rest of my life?

Can we all just take a moment to bless how accurate this post is?

gothlolita: im Sorry but you two cant get the marriage. the bible said Adam and Eve not matthew and...

Fri, 24 May 2013 14:12:51 -0400

gothlolita:

im Sorry but you two cant get the marriage. the bible said Adam and Eve not matthew and ashley. come back when youve legally changed your names

makebelievesandcelluloids: me bottoming for the first time

Fri, 24 May 2013 13:56:51 -0400

makebelievesandcelluloids:

me bottoming for the first time

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Fri, 24 May 2013 13:54:18 -0400

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Fri, 24 May 2013 13:38:58 -0400